1. In what ways am I willing to adopt a whole new attitude about weight control, body image, and eating?
This has a tough one for me. I struggle with “weight loss is not our only goal.” I have been willing to accept that my body may not be meant to be as small as I’d like it to be. I am also accepting that what is “normal” eating for someone else may not be “normal” eating for me.
As far as body image, I recently noticed that I have a distorted image of my body. I was totally unaware of this fact. Before OA, I thought I was smaller than my actual body size. Now that I have been abstinent and lost some weight, I learned I believe I am bigger than my current body size. More than anything, I want to adopt an accurate body image and no that my ideal body size is one that reflects good health and not vanity.
2. What has my attitude been about food and eating?
Before OA, I was totally obsessed with food and eating. If I wasn’t eating, I was thinking about food. If I wasn’t thinking about food, I was eating. I also watching shows on The Food Network was a hobby.
3. Am I ready to give up self-will regarding food? Explain.
In all honesty, I still do not think I am ready to give up self-will, not completely. I say “not completely” because I continue to give up my self-will and then take it back continually. Even though it hasn’t gotten to the point of a relapse, I recognize that it is a problem. One of my OA friends share the following that I really find helpful: I rely on Higher Power, not will power. This saying has really stuck with me because I have a tendency to rely on my will power when I really should surrender to my Higher Power.
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